a deal with god (alive_she_cried) wrote in screw_your_face,
a deal with god

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Why're you so ugly: Because I look like Michael Jackson on heroin. I have the nose and everything.
Name: Tonianne
Have you hit puberty, yet: *bleeds through pants*
Height: 5'4''?
Most Valuable Possesion: My cigarette box collection. Because I'm too lame to part with it.
What decorates your walls: Paint, random writing, filth, food and a tiny bit of blood on one of the walls.
Do Animals turn you on? If so.. which animal(s): All of Jesus' creatures turn me on. My favorite animals are cats. They're good for sexin.
Which three people you want to sleep with: One of them you don't know. The others would be Christina Ricci just because I have been determined to fuck her since I was 9, and the other would be... Kate Bush because she's a crazy bitch and I haven't had enough crazy bitches in my vagina.
Most embarrasing thing about your body: I have no pinky toe nails. They're just little pointy things where nails should be.
How many STD's do you have and what are they: None!
How can we piss you off: By kicking me in the face. Don't kick me in the face, please.
What makes you the happiest? (And if you're too cool to be happy.. What would make you happy?) I've discovered a way to extract whatever happiness I can find out of anything, so, for the most part I'm pretty content. Just, learning how to adapt has made me happy.
Four things that turn you on:
- Curvey women.
- Smokers.
- Big noses.
- Humor.
Four things that turn you off:
- Southern accents.
- Penis.
- People who impose their life choices on others. Example - militant vegans.
- Pretentiousness.
Your opinions on:
1. Pissing in the shower: If you're gonna clean yourself right afterwards who gives a fuck? It's piss. That's going to be washed.
2. Old men hitting on young women: Get the fuck outta here. Better not happen to me.
3. Vaginal blood: Exhilarating.
4. Disney movies: Sufficiently creepy. Especially the older ones.
5. You're a filthy cunt: Why yes, I did fuck your mother!
And Lastly
Why should we let you be apart of screw_your_face?:
Because I have all the cookies.

And now:

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